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Cheap Seats 2020

Bloom goes Boom - 02/26

By Rich Trzupek
  Did not see that coming! Like a lot of folks, I could not see the DNC letting Bernie win their nomination, no matter how much support he got in the primaries. Biden was supposed to bail out the party by appealing to moderates, but that was doomed to fail. The pair of aviators has not been made that would make Uncle Joe seem even remotely cool to millennial voters. The fact that the DNC would put their eggs in the Biden basket is just further proof of how out of touch the DC establishment of both parties truly are.
  So, like a lot of people, I figured the Dems would ultimately end up with Bloomberg. He’s legitimately moderate and he’s obviously a lot more on the ball than Biden, albeit that is setting a pretty low bar. And, from a Dem perspective, you could do a lot worse than a candidate who requires no funding.
  There are a lot of things about Bloomie that I don’t care for, but I also think he’s often right on the big things and many of the little annoying things – like his Big Gulp war – would never get traction on a national level. Though not my personal preference, I’m sure the country would do fine under a President Bloomberg. In a brokered convention, which is likely where Dems are heading, he is the obvious choice.
  Or was, anyway. Like a whole lot of people who watched the last debate, I was stunned by just how badly Bloomberg comes across. He’s terrible to the point that it’s almost kind of sad. Elizabeth Warren pounced on Bloomie, beating him like a rented mule and prompting Mark Steyn, the incomparable conservative scribe, to dub her the “Cherokee Dominatrix.” Geez, I hope that sticks.
  It’s hard to believe that anyone would go into a debate in this day and age without having some snappy, ready-made comebacks ready to go when opponents starting poking at the obvious open sores in Bloomberg’s record. Instead the man seemed truly stunned to learn there was a target on his back and absolutely baffled about how to respond.
  Love him or hate him, President Trump has never been accused of being boring on stage. He either enrages or inspires and there is very little in between. Bloomberg does neither. He’s dry toast – tepid tea – flat beer. Can that be fixed somehow? Because if it can’t the hundreds of millions, approaching billions, of money that Bloomie is willing to spend on the slickest advertising money can by won’t make a damned bit of difference. A candidate for president has to do a lot of talking on the campaign trail, and it’s much easier to hide stupid than it is to disguise dull.
  One can’t help but wonder if Mike suffers from the patrician complex that infects a great many smart and successful people. Rules are made for commoners, not their betters. This is surely the mindset that allowed Mayor Bloomberg to indulge in a rather unique travel arrangement whilst he was head honcho of New York City.
  Bloomie has a beautiful home on Bermuda. While mayor, unless city business demanded his presence over a weekend, he typically spent the weekend at his Bermuda estate. How did he make that commute? C’mon, you know the answer: private jet!
  Thus the green champion who would have all of us in the proletariat reducing our carbon footprints to microscopic levels sees nothing wrong with routinely engaging in the kind of travel that expands his carbon footprint well beyond King Kong territory. It’s that sort of arrogance that eventually leads to Bloomie hitting stage unprepared, unloved and unlikely to do better in either case.
  Email: richtrzupek@gmail.com





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